7 days ago5 min read

Migratory Grief in Childhood

Change often generates uncertainty, which is frequently associated with anxiety, a natural fear response to the unknown (Conrado, 2016). This phenomenon is particularly common in children, who lack the maturity to fully assess or comprehend new situations. For this reason, as Conrado (2016) notes, the presence of primary caregivers becomes essential, as they act as fundamental guides in this process.

A significant event during childhood, such as moving to a new home, can leave a lasting emotional mark (Conrado, 2016). A move is not merely a change of residence; it also entails a grieving process (Ruiz, 2012). This grief refers to the loss of memories, emotions, and feelings tied to the home left behind. While both adults and children experience these emotions, adults generally have more developed tools to manage the emotional impact. In contrast, children may find this process more challenging because their routines are deeply rooted in their previous home, leading to various emotional responses such as fear, anxiety, and sadness. Given this context, Ruiz (2012) emphasizes the importance of supporting children through the transition of moving, offering emotional guidance and strategies to help them adapt better to the change.

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What Is Childhood Migratory Grief?

Various reasons can lead a family to migrate, including the pursuit of better opportunities, armed conflicts, and social persecution (Capeluto, 2023). Although some causes are more traumatic than others, migration invariably involves a grieving process. This is especially significant for children, referred to as childhood migratory grief. The term describes the emotional responses and adaptation process children experience when leaving their place of origin. Psychiatrist Joseba Achotegui explains that migratory grief is a multifaceted process involving several significant losses. Migrants, whether permanently or temporarily, are separated from their home, traditions, culture, friendships, family bonds, and, in some cases, even their native language. According to Capeluto (2023), this separation inevitably triggers notable psychological effects, particularly in children.

Emotional Impact on Migrant Children

In an increasingly globalized world, migration continues to grow, and unfortunately, children are the ones who suffer the deepest effects (Osores, 2022). According to Osores (2022), while adults understand the urgency of escaping hunger, unemployment, or violence, children face a torrent of unexpected experiences that can affect their emotional health, often without parents realizing the extent of the issue.

The experience of migratory grief varies among children. Migrating with both parents differs from migrating with only one or facing a journey through multiple countries fraught with danger (Osores, 2022). Unlike adults, children do not fully understand what it means to leave behind the life they know and adapt to a new environment with differences in language, geography, and customs. As Osores (2022) states, the situation worsens when children begin to notice the absence of loved ones, school, home, and personal belongings, intensifying their sense of loss.

Manifestations of Childhood Migratory Grief

Ambivalent Feelings

Children often experience ambivalent feelings during this process (Capeluto, 2023). They may have mixed or conflicting emotions while adapting to a new home and lifestyle. For some, discovering an unfamiliar environment may be exciting, while for others, it may evoke fear and worry. Many children do not understand the reasons behind leaving their friends and homes, complicating the farewell process. Older children, who better comprehend the situation, may feel hope for a better life but also deep nostalgia, loneliness, and sadness about leaving their place of origin (Capeluto, 2023).

Aggressiveness or Isolation

Another factor to consider is the emergence of aggressive or isolating behaviors (Capeluto, 2023). A study by the Antonio Ruiz de Montoya University in Peru found that frustration from moving can lead to harmful behaviors, such as verbal or physical aggression or voluntary isolation. Refugee children are particularly vulnerable. According to Capeluto (2023), they often feel excluded or different due to cultural or language barriers, which can lead to social withdrawal or challenging behaviors as expressions of pain, anger, or frustration.

Somatic Complaints

Somatic complaints are also common (Capeluto, 2023). While preadolescents and teenagers may verbally express their discomfort, younger children often manifest it through physical symptoms. According to Capeluto (2023), these symptoms include headaches, fatigue, abdominal pain, vomiting, changes in appetite, and sleep disturbances, such as nightmares.

Anxiety

Anxiety is another typical manifestation in children experiencing migration (Capeluto, 2023). The uncertainty and changes associated with the process—adapting to a new environment, making new friends, and adjusting to the customs of the host country—contribute to anxiety. As Capeluto (2023) notes, children often experience fear of the unknown, such as learning a new language or facing new situations.

Developmental Delays or Regression

In particularly confusing or traumatic migration cases, developmental delays or regression may occur (Capeluto, 2023). Younger children may regress in toilet training or language use, reverting to baby-like speech. Additionally, they may display spatial-temporal disorientation, as confirmed by a study published in the Journal of Applied Developmental Psychology on refugee children in Lebanon. Furthermore, Capeluto (2023) notes that academic performance may decline, as priorities shift during this destabilizing time.

Preparing Children for a Move: Keys to a Successful Transition

Information

It is essential to communicate positively with children about the decision to move, providing all necessary information and answering their questions to help them prepare for the change gradually (Ruiz, 2012; Conrado, 2016). Avoiding the topic can create uncertainty, so explaining the reasons for the move is recommended (Ruiz, 2012). As the moving date approaches, it is essential to revisit the topic and ask how they feel about the change (Ruiz, 2012).

Encouragement

Motivating children to feel excited about the move is crucial (Ruiz, 2012). Showing them photos of the new house, maps of the city, and local landmarks can help familiarize them with the area (Conrado, 2016). Ruiz (2012) emphasizes reassuring children that they will have their own space in the new home, highlighting the positive aspects of the move.

Involvement

Involving children in the moving process is beneficial (Ruiz, 2012). If possible, they can accompany parents to view potential homes, making them feel part of the decision. Allowing them to pack their belongings also fosters engagement in the transition. Ruiz (2012) suggests involving them in unpacking in the new home to ease adaptation.

Activities and Places

Similarly, gathering information about nearby activities and public spaces, such as parks or squares, where children can have fun (Ruiz, 2012), can help them view the change more positively. If a change of school is necessary, Ruiz (2012) suggests it is important to talk with the new teachers, explain the situation, and closely monitor the children’s adaptation process.

Communication

Open and clear communication is essential for a smooth transition (Ruiz, 2012). Taking time to talk about feelings and offering unconditional support is critical (Ruiz, 2012). Positive framing is vital; highlighting potential benefits like making new friends or discovering exciting places can help children see the change as an opportunity (Conrado, 2016). After moving, involving children in decorating their new rooms can be exciting. Maintaining contact with old friends, even through phone calls, is also important (Conrado, 2016). Parents should remind children they are not alone and offer understanding and openness to any concerns (Ruiz, 2012).

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